Inventos
Inventions
-bicicleta ecológica autopropulsada y sin frenos ni pedales, para cuestas abajo (para deportistas de subida y suicidas con vértigo)
-patines sin ruedas, de frenado permanente (para estarse quieto y envejecer más deprisa que los compañeros que se están moviendo a velocidad “v”. Al estar quieto, el tiempo transcurre más deprisa.
- calzoncillos autoadhesivos y sin bragueta. Para sufrir penitencias en momentos de apuro.
- Condones perforados para tener familia numerosa.
- Bastón flexible, para viejos carne de asilo y reducción de los gastos en pensiones.
- Rabo de boina personalizado, según el tamaño del pene, para atraer a las hembras a la procreación.
- Máquina para enderezar plátanos de Canarias, a fin de uniformizar el reparto de masas en el frutero.
- Gafas con cristales opacos de inox steel, para darse hostias por la calle y caer en alcantarillas sin tapa.
- Canasta de baloncesto de red cosida, para cancelar el partido al primer tanto.
- Portería de futbol con campo electromagnético de alta intensidad, que no permite al portero ni acercarse y a cambio, el equipo contrario (tu equipo), gana siempre, eso sí, lanzando desde fuera del área.
- Pañuelo moquero, fabricado con "blandiblum verde"
- Arado-rodillo de aplanar surcos
- Cordones de zapato, con lazada prefabricada irrompible.
- Estilográfica, con depósito de tinta macizo, no se puede poner tinta. (especial para periodistas especializados)
- Corbata inversa, con el nudo a la altura del ombligo, para los antisistema, pero elegantes.
- Capsulas de sulfitos de vino tinto, para provocar dolor de cabeza, para sentirse mal alguna vez, cuando eres rico, guapo y deportista.
- Tablet PC, con pantalla retina de madera de caoba, totalmente invisible. Para dedicar el tiempo a leer libros antiguos (impresos en Papel)
- Teléfono móvil sin micro ni altavoz, para no decir ni escuchar chorradas.
- Tenedor cóncavo y sin dientes, para ser usado como cuchara. Apto para comer sopa con tenedor y que no te traten de tonto.
- Cuchara sin cavidad y con dientes largos, para verificar que la sopa se cae y no llega a la boca.
- Calcetines sin pie, solo tobilleros, para ir elegante en verano, con sandalias.
- Camisa con botones pero sin ojales, para lucir pecho (unisex)
- Billetes de 105 €, para ver la cara que ponen en los comercios, cuando pagas.
- Rollos de papel higiénico de polietileno.
- Platos soperos totalmente planos, para poner junto a las cuchara planas de antes.
- Clavos de dos cabezas y martillos sin mango.
- Tornillos sin hélice, para colocar sin destornillador, usando el martillo con mango.
- Helados calientes derretidos, para tomar en invierno.
- Sangría sin vino, para tener que echarle aunque sea Fanta.
- Jerséis sin mangas, para usarlos en los andes, como si fuesen ponchos estrechos.
Y así un montón de bobadas más, que mucha gente compraría, tras el marketing adecuado.
TRANSLATION
eco - propelled bicycle without brakes or pedals, for slopes below ( athletes rise and suicide vertigo)
-skates without wheels, continuous braking ,and grow faster than peers who are moving at speed “v” . When you stand still, time passes faster.
- Adhesive fly without underpants. To suffer in times of difficulties.
- Condoms drilled to have large families.
- Stick flexible for old meat -seekers and reducing pension expenditure.
- Rabo custom beret, depending on the size of the penis to attract females to procreation.
- Machine for straightening Canary bananas in order to standardize the distribution of mass in the fruit.
- Sunglasses with tinted windows stainless steel, to be hosts for the street and falling into sewers without cover.
- Basketball hoop sewn network to cancel the party first goal.
- Goal of soccer with high intensity electromagnetic field , which does not allow the goalie or approach and in return , the opposing team ( your team) always wins , yes, throwing from outside the box .
- Moquero bandana, made ”green blandiblum "
- Plow - flattening roller grooves
- Shoe laces with prefabricated unbreakable loop.
- Fountain, solid ink tank cannot put ink. (Especially for journalists)
- Reverse Tie, with knot at the navel to the anti-system, but elegant.
- Capsules of red wine sulfites to cause headache, to feel bad sometimes, when you're rich, handsome and athletic .
- Tablet PC with retina display mahogany, totally invisible. To take the time to read old books (printed on paper )
- Mobile phone without micro or speaker , to say or hear bullshit.
- Concave and toothless Fork, to be used as spoon. Child eating soup with a fork and do not try to fool.
- Bucket without cavity and long teeth, to verify the soup falls and reaches the mouth.
- Socks without foot, ankle just to go elegant in summer with sandals.
- Shirt without eyelets, to show off his chest (unisex)
- Currency notes of € 105, to see the look on their faces at a store, when you pay .
- Toilet paper rolls of polyethylene.
- Hot soup- completely flat, to put together a flat spoon before.
- Two-headed nails and hammers without handle.
- No propeller screws, screwdriver to place without using the hammer handle.
- Ice cream melted hot to take in winter.
- Bleeding without wine, to have to throw even Fanta.
- Sleeveless sweaters, for use in the Andes, as if they were close ponchos.
And so a lot of nonsense again, many people buy after proper marketing.
-skates without wheels, continuous braking ,and grow faster than peers who are moving at speed “v” . When you stand still, time passes faster.
- Adhesive fly without underpants. To suffer in times of difficulties.
- Condoms drilled to have large families.
- Stick flexible for old meat -seekers and reducing pension expenditure.
- Rabo custom beret, depending on the size of the penis to attract females to procreation.
- Machine for straightening Canary bananas in order to standardize the distribution of mass in the fruit.
- Sunglasses with tinted windows stainless steel, to be hosts for the street and falling into sewers without cover.
- Basketball hoop sewn network to cancel the party first goal.
- Goal of soccer with high intensity electromagnetic field , which does not allow the goalie or approach and in return , the opposing team ( your team) always wins , yes, throwing from outside the box .
- Moquero bandana, made ”green blandiblum "
- Plow - flattening roller grooves
- Shoe laces with prefabricated unbreakable loop.
- Fountain, solid ink tank cannot put ink. (Especially for journalists)
- Reverse Tie, with knot at the navel to the anti-system, but elegant.
- Capsules of red wine sulfites to cause headache, to feel bad sometimes, when you're rich, handsome and athletic .
- Tablet PC with retina display mahogany, totally invisible. To take the time to read old books (printed on paper )
- Mobile phone without micro or speaker , to say or hear bullshit.
- Concave and toothless Fork, to be used as spoon. Child eating soup with a fork and do not try to fool.
- Bucket without cavity and long teeth, to verify the soup falls and reaches the mouth.
- Socks without foot, ankle just to go elegant in summer with sandals.
- Shirt without eyelets, to show off his chest (unisex)
- Currency notes of € 105, to see the look on their faces at a store, when you pay .
- Toilet paper rolls of polyethylene.
- Hot soup- completely flat, to put together a flat spoon before.
- Two-headed nails and hammers without handle.
- No propeller screws, screwdriver to place without using the hammer handle.
- Ice cream melted hot to take in winter.
- Bleeding without wine, to have to throw even Fanta.
- Sleeveless sweaters, for use in the Andes, as if they were close ponchos.
And so a lot of nonsense again, many people buy after proper marketing.
